disorder

Stephanie "Just Live"

Stephanie "Just Live"

“I was confined to my home for fourteen years with agoraphobia. My entire world had shrunk. I did not leave. At all. I literally felt like if I backed out of the driveway, I was going to die. It was extremely isolating. One day I told my husband not to worry about it, that I could do it, I’d be fine. But I knew that was the day I was going to die. I felt like I had no one and that it would be easier on my kids to visit me at the cemetery than to see me slowly dying at home.

Eventually I started getting better, and knew I only had one shot and I was wasting away. So that’s why I came out, guns blazing…”

READ STEPHANIE’S STORY HERE

Lane "Loving Lane"

Lane "Loving Lane"

“He was blue in color and was making a strange sound with each breath. My smile at the sight of him quickly turned into a panicked grimace. The nurse set him on my stomach and wiped him off in preparation for skin-to-skin, then his whole little body went limp.

An alarm went off and a team of doctors and nurses charged into the delivery room. They wheeled my baby boy out of the room. I hadn't gotten to hold him or even really gotten to see him up close. I was left in the room with one other nurse for an hour to recover. I was a shell of a person….”

READ LANE'S STORY HERE

Sandy and Brianna "Overwhelming Joy"

Sandy and Brianna "Overwhelming Joy"

“After a fourteen day stay in the NICU, I was finally taking my Brianna home, the day I had dreamed of since finding out I was pregnant. But, the day did not come with the normal joys or normal worries of a first time mother. I questioned myself... was I even capable of taking care of this child? Was she going to be ok? What happens if I cannot take care of her?

...I have learned through all my years with Brianna, that I have one amazing, brave, sweet girl. Brianna shows me all the time what life is really all about."

READ SANDY & BRIANNA’S STORY HERE

Cameron and Zeke "Alone-Together"

Cameron and Zeke "Alone-Together"

“If you are the parent of a child with special needs, there are books for you. If you have a son or daughter with a disability, there are support groups. There are lots of other people out there that will tell you how to parent. “What there isn’t, is someone to show you how to be a sibling to someone with special needs.” And yet somehow, Cameron was born knowing how to be the best sister to her brother. According to Cara, their mother, Cameron, “has shown complete fearlessness, dedication, and maturity,” all without being taught. From her daughter, Cara has learned that “to be gentle, and to fight CAN be the same thing.”

READ CAMERON & ZEKE’S STORY HERE

Bryndi "Don't Be Silent"

Bryndi "Don't Be Silent"

“My depression and anxiety are constants. They are overwhelmingly heavy. The weight of them almost knocks the breath out of me; it takes everything I have just to move and function.

The anxiety is exhausting. The racing of my heart and the pressure on my chest make it difficult to breathe. There are days when I feel like I don’t have anything left that anxiety hasn’t already taken.”

READ BRYNDI’S STORY HERE

Dave "En-Gage"

Dave "En-Gage"

“A suicide survivor is one who has lost a family member or someone close to them by suicide. I lost my son on Feb 22nd of this year. As I sit here typing, it still seems like a bad dream that I will wake up from at some point. I wish that was the case but I know that it’s not a dream. It is a reality that my family and I have been handed.”

READ DAVE’S STORY HERE

Sabrina "Mercy To Both"

Sabrina "Mercy To Both"

“The depression and self harm became a daily battle. Late at nights I would spend time writing out suicide notes, cutting, and blaming God for the life I was living. I hated life, I hated feeling like I had nobody to talk to without feeling judged or misunderstood.”

READ SABRINA’S STORY HERE

Chuck "Borrow My Angel"

Chuck "Borrow My Angel"

“For the first time in my life, I felt EVERY emotion. I’ve realized by now in my life that suicide attempts, whether the person in need survives or not, bring out EVERY SINGLE emotion known to man. You go through every stage. Angry. Confused. Sadness for them. Hurt that how could they do this to YOU. Frustrated. Helpless that you can’t take on their burden and bear it FOR them. Relief and happiness if they survive the attempt, that thank the Lord they are still here. Relief and happiness even when someone dies from suicide, because you pray they are finally at peace with their turmoil even though you would give every OUNCE of you to change the outcome.”

READ CHUCK’S STORY HERE

Jamie "Redefine Success"

Jamie "Redefine Success"

“We started down the parenthood road February 20, 1993, the day Connor was born. Connor was a typical developing baby until a series of events took place. When he was twelve months old, we began to notice regression and had major concerns. He lost all his language and his motor skills slowly began to go away.

After trips to four major hospitals and universities, in 1996, Kansas University had a developmental team that finally put a name to it, autism. With our only reference for this word being the movie “Rainman”, we set out on a journey to find help for Connor.”

READ JAMIE’S STORY HERE

Jackie "Shackles Are Not Alone"

Jackie "Shackles Are Not Alone"

“I eventually reached rock bottom and attempted suicide on multiple different occasions. Each time, I would always say that if God brought me back, I would know that I had a purpose. Well, as you can tell by reading this, He definitely brought me back…but I would always fall into the same relentless cycle.”

READ JACKIE’S STORY HERE

Jenny "Recognize and Acknowledge"

Jenny "Recognize and Acknowledge"

“I can recognize that while I may face the dispositions of depression, anxiety, and bipolar disorder interwoven into my genetic makeup, it is what path I choose to take or reroute that determines my fate. I talk with so many of my friends that feel so disheartened that they can’t “beat” or overcome their depression or anxiety and don’t understand why they can’t be stronger, better, louder than the voices that tell them they aren’t Enough. I challenge those friends (and constantly myself) to consider a different perspective.”

READ JENNY’S STORY HERE

Bailey "Out of the Ashes"

Bailey "Out of the Ashes"

“I started to struggle with this deep, dark depression. No one really understood how bad it was until I called my sister one day to tell her that I loved her, and I was sorry, and that I had just taken all of my medication in an attempt to end my life. Over the next few years, there were more overdoses and hospitalizations than I can even remember.”

READ BAILEY’S STORY HERE

Allison "Faking Happy"

Allison "Faking Happy"

“I got away with faking it for awhile. Faking happy, faking stability, faking the pain—thinking that maybe if I didn’t acknowledge it, it would no longer exist. But then came the massive anxiety attacks which made me lose my will to live. I was suffering from even more severe depression than originally diagnosed with. There I was, somehow with the most incredible people surrounding me, and there for me to lean on, but yet I was more suicidal than I would care to ever admit.”

READ ALLISON’S STORY HERE

Jana "Finding Purpose Through Pain"

Jana "Finding Purpose Through Pain"

“Depression weaves itself through my family like a poison ivy vine. My uncles, aunts, parents, cousins and countless others suffer in one form or another. I too suffer from depression. I needed to try and figure out all of this mess.”

READ JANA’S STORY HERE

Christian "The Overflow"

Christian "The Overflow"

"When we had just welcomed our third son, Stellan. At my postpartum appointment, my doctor agreed I needed to go back on the antidepressants. My baby blues booked an extended stay and weren’t planning on leaving any time soon. It was scary and painful and I began hiding from my children, afraid my thoughts would become my reality. I cried, and they cried."

READ CHRISTIAN’S STORY HERE

Robin "Beautiful Bright Glow"

Robin "Beautiful Bright Glow"

“I remember bits and pieces of that day. I remember seeing the doctor and filling my prescriptions. From that point it's a bit of a blur. I know that I went home to lay down and rest. In my mind that's all I thought I did but the events afterwards obviously were different. I woke up in a hospital bed three days later from a drug overdose. I had taken every pill In both bottles and drank every bit of whatever liquid medication I was given too.”

READ ROBIN’S STORY HERE

Brenna "Inside My Fishbowl"

Brenna "Inside My Fishbowl"

"Anxiety is a cruel disorder. Its symptoms mimic those of other illnesses, diseases, and disorders. It knows its host intimately, knows what they fear most, and exploits those fears without mercy. It's like a box in a horror movie that, in order to break the main character, contains an incarnation of the darkest corner of their mind."

READ BRENNA’S STORY HERE

Abigail "Who I Am Underneath"

Abigail "Who I Am Underneath"

“The third year at college, I only lasted a few months. One day I was in an interior design class and just decided to drop everything. I didn’t want to go to school anymore, I didn’t want to be around people, and I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life. I completely dropped out...of school, out of life. It was a mess!”

READ ABIGAIL’S STORY HERE

Michael "That Light"

Michael "That Light"

“Depression is real, and a lot of people deal with it. I just want other people dealing with depression to know everything comes in time, and I’m feeling more optimistic lately.”

READ MICHAEL’S STORY HERE

Angie "BEST MEDICINE"

Angie "BEST MEDICINE"

"I remember walking into my closet, looking at my clothes and having difficulty trying to summon the energy to get dressed. At work, as a hospice social worker, I wept uncontrollably at the end of every day. All I wanted to do is crawl in bed try to sleep it off."

READ ANGIE'S STORY HERE

Lydia "Potential for Love"

Lydia "Potential for Love"

"The weight of this jealousy and endless comparison became so grand by the time I was eighteen that I would have almost daily panic attacks looking in the mirror. I would cry and think about how my life would have played out if I were her, or her, maybe him, just anyone else."

READ LYDIA’S STORY HERE

Bryn "I Am Beautiful"

Bryn "I Am Beautiful"

“In April of this year, I realized that continuing to live with suicidal thoughts would most likely end up being fatal...At the time of my admission, I still didn’t consider myself as having an eating disorder. But after a few days of not purging, I found myself fighting such strong urges and finally realized that my bulimia was a significant problem too.”

READ BRYN’S STORY HERE

Anthony "Transgender"

Anthony "Transgender"

"I think that the biggest reason that I was very prone to depression and anxiety was because of my sexuality. Being transgender and having my religion was one of the biggest things that destroyed me."

READ ANTHONY’S STORY HERE

Saylor "Haunting"

Saylor "Haunting"

"The depression was haunting me. I had been pondering suicide for months."

READ SAYLOR’S STORY HERE

Carrie and Maria "Lifesaver"

Carrie and Maria "Lifesaver"

"We have overcome domestic abuse, but still suffer from Post-traumatic stress disorder and depression. I'm also bipolar so at one point, cutting myself was the only way to cope. My daughter Maria has Aspergers. It has been a tough road, to say the least."

READ CARRIE & MARIA’S STORY HERE